Although I have written a similar blog to this, the subject is so important that I feel the need to ask again for further help with research. At present there is an ongoing research programme being conducted at Birmingham University which has huge implications for women suffering from emotional disturbances after childbirth. This will help scientists understand more about the factors that make some women poorly, and will lead to better prediction and treatments for anyone who has had mood disorders. Clearly with the recent dramatic rise in sufferers, it is vital that we improve our understanding and in particular prepare the next generation being that is often hereditary.
The BDRN or Bipolar disorder and Postpartum Research is conducting the largest study so far and 6000 individuals have already taken part in these studies. However more help is needed and as we already know that mood disorders have a genetic trait, blood samples are still needed in order to find a cure. I am one of the 6000 women who has already taken part and it couldn't have been more interesting. One of the researchers travelled for several hours to visit and interviewed me with regards to my own illness. She then took a blood sample which was analysed, along with thousands of others in the hope that it will shed some light on the evil that is Postnatal illness. I am delighted to be part of this cutting edge research which delves deep into the DNA and tries to isolate that gene or genes responsible. It had the added bonus of helping me understand the illness, and that it was something in my genetic make up and not of my own making. In other words, it freed me of the guilt so many of us sufferers have with regard to our own situations. It was unavoidable, and I was always going to be ill, just as some people have heart disease or cancers in their own genetic makeup.
If you want to take part in this critical and often life saving research you can contact the research team directly. The leading lady is DR Katherine Gordon Smith and she can be contacted on 0212 301 2361 or at moodresearch@contacts.bham.ac.uk She is particularly interested in women who have had a period of 'elevated mood' or mania as is sometimes called. However I'm sure she would only be too happy to hear from anyone who is willing to help with this valuable study.
Blessings as usual. Suzi AKA Caroline Church x
Sunday, 1 February 2015
Wednesday, 21 January 2015
Could your insomnia be caused by your hormones?
When I was poorly and before I had my hysterectomy, I would often have sleeping issues which would leave me oversleeping (sometimes even needing to sleep during the day) and then the opposite, where I would often wake up with a start, and would then be awake with for several hours. The result would be an inability to cope with the day ahead, and then a compulsion to sleep, and so the cycle goes on . If you've ever suffered from insomnia you will be familiar with this pattern, which can often leave you despairing and reaching for sleeping tablets, or worse, alcohol which has the added ability to wake you suffering from dehydration. Sometimes I would wake with a racing heart and sometimes my mind would be going over and over on an endless loop as the adrenaline flooded my system, and fuelled my sense of impending doom.
After reading and learning about hormones and discovering that I had a hormonal illness, I found a perfect solution to my insomnia, and that is natural progesterone. My body was clearly having issues maintaining equilibrium, and so I used this amazing medicine to help me with my sleeping problems, particularly if I awoke in the early hours. To make sure however, that it wasn't only me that this could work for, I just conducted the same experiment on a friend to be sure that it wasn't just a happy coincidence.
This particular friend is one of my 'hormonal sisters' and has had health issues for sometime with PMS, mood swings and crippling insomnia which again would leave her suffering from exhaustion, and would even enhance her mood swings. As an experiment, I asked her to use some Progesterone with a small snack before bed, and then again if she awoke in the night which she did. By Day 1 her sleeping had already improved, and by day 2 and 3, she was astonished by her new sleep pattern. She even noticed that the 'quality' of her sleep had improved and she was able to sleep more soundly and deeply. This I might add was after several weeks of lying awake and catastrophizing, which I can assure you is deeply unpleasant and has the ability to ruin your life. I'm delighted that it has worked for her and it adds weight to my book 'I blame the Hormones' where I explain perfectly how hormones are often overlooked and completely misunderstood. Another bonus to this is that her PMS this month is also non-existent, which at times was severe and debilitating and had required medical intervention.
Before you use natural progesterone, which you can by easily online, you should always have a chat with your GP as some women are intolerant to both, the natural and synthetic kind. However, if you have been suffering from any hormonal issues, you can always give it a try and should ask your doctor for a prescription. The particular brand I use is called CYCLOGEST and has the added bonus of being cheaper, and can work within the first hour of using. The only side effect is a little gastric wind, but it is in my experience that this soon passes the more your body gets used to the suppository. The progesterone cream can be purchased easily enough, and you rub it into the skin where it is easily metabolized and can lessen any troublesome symptoms, particularly pre-menstrual mood swings.
For further reading on the miracle that is our hormones, I would take look at an amazing website by an amazing lady (Sonya),at www.hormonesoup.com/ where you can find tons of information about women's health issues, and where there is even a television channel for this sole cause!
Please let me know your thoughts on this topic and let me know if it works for you, Suzi, AKA Caroline Church x
After reading and learning about hormones and discovering that I had a hormonal illness, I found a perfect solution to my insomnia, and that is natural progesterone. My body was clearly having issues maintaining equilibrium, and so I used this amazing medicine to help me with my sleeping problems, particularly if I awoke in the early hours. To make sure however, that it wasn't only me that this could work for, I just conducted the same experiment on a friend to be sure that it wasn't just a happy coincidence.
This particular friend is one of my 'hormonal sisters' and has had health issues for sometime with PMS, mood swings and crippling insomnia which again would leave her suffering from exhaustion, and would even enhance her mood swings. As an experiment, I asked her to use some Progesterone with a small snack before bed, and then again if she awoke in the night which she did. By Day 1 her sleeping had already improved, and by day 2 and 3, she was astonished by her new sleep pattern. She even noticed that the 'quality' of her sleep had improved and she was able to sleep more soundly and deeply. This I might add was after several weeks of lying awake and catastrophizing, which I can assure you is deeply unpleasant and has the ability to ruin your life. I'm delighted that it has worked for her and it adds weight to my book 'I blame the Hormones' where I explain perfectly how hormones are often overlooked and completely misunderstood. Another bonus to this is that her PMS this month is also non-existent, which at times was severe and debilitating and had required medical intervention.
Before you use natural progesterone, which you can by easily online, you should always have a chat with your GP as some women are intolerant to both, the natural and synthetic kind. However, if you have been suffering from any hormonal issues, you can always give it a try and should ask your doctor for a prescription. The particular brand I use is called CYCLOGEST and has the added bonus of being cheaper, and can work within the first hour of using. The only side effect is a little gastric wind, but it is in my experience that this soon passes the more your body gets used to the suppository. The progesterone cream can be purchased easily enough, and you rub it into the skin where it is easily metabolized and can lessen any troublesome symptoms, particularly pre-menstrual mood swings.
For further reading on the miracle that is our hormones, I would take look at an amazing website by an amazing lady (Sonya),at www.hormonesoup.com/ where you can find tons of information about women's health issues, and where there is even a television channel for this sole cause!
Please let me know your thoughts on this topic and let me know if it works for you, Suzi, AKA Caroline Church x
Friday, 9 January 2015
Can Cannabis be medicinal?
As an activist and writer, I am involved in lots of different forums from all different countries which have been vital when I've been researching, but also have the added bonus of putting me in touch with other sufferers. It is so helpful to know when you are poorly that you are not alone and these forums have been essential in my recovery and obtaining vital information. Sufferers can also swap coping strategies and the latest findings, which sometimes includes medical text and available treatments.
Time and time again the subject of cannabis arises and whether it can be used for medicinal purposes, particularly depression and emotional mood disorders. Here's my story and why I don't think it should be used if you have a depressive illness.
I know some people use cannabis for certain disease states, including Multiple Sclerosis and even Cancer and I used to use it for many years to help me relax. In fact I used it continuously throughout my twenties and well into my 30's to help me cope with my loneliness and inability to face up to my own depression. So in other words, I used it to help me cope with the daily grind of life and whatever that entailed at that particular time. I sometimes used alcohol in the same way, and would always have an emotional crutch in some way shape or form, in the hope that it would mask my low self esteem and in particular my rages and internalized anger which was part of my disorder. One particular evening, and this was after many years of smoking without adverse effects, I had the most awful of reactions, and what started as a panic attack quickly escalated into what can only be described as a terrifying psychosis with hallucinations thrown in. I was in the most awful of states and had to ask a friend to sit with me until the effects wore off, which incidentally was many hours after I had smoked. We came close to calling an ambulance which in hindsight is what we should have done!!
This reaction was so profound, I honestly swore never to smoke again, and thankfully never did, my cannabis days were over! I believe now, that the evidence speaks for itself and there can be a point that anyone can tip over the edge, regardless of whether they have emotional difficulties or not. However, if you do have a mental disorder, regardless of whether its hormonal, bipolar or schizophrenia then you are even further at risk. There is also some new research which is coming forward regarding the adverse effects of cannabis use if you have ADHD for example, and this can cause further mental illness later in life. It really doesn't seem worth it when you think of the long term effects and the damage it can do to an already fragile mind, although I know that others disagree with me. It seems to be that until you have that one adverse response, where you have been frightened out of your wits, you simply don't believe it can happen to you. From bitter experience I can tell you that it does and can have very serious consequences with some even needing hospital admission until their psychosis has passed. Some sadly, never recover and I have spoken to a few that have needed ongoing and long term care after a bad experience.
Fortunately for me, just having that one bad episode, was enough to stop me from smoking and for that I am eternally grateful. I no longer want to take the risk of tampering with something that I know is very precious, and that is the human mind.With this latest and all encompassing research which is available to us now, I simply don't think its worth it and we have to find another way to help us relax which doesn't involve putting ourselves at risk of psychological damage.
If you are having problems with cannabis use you can call Narcotics Anonymous UK on 0300 999 1212 who have helped many people I know and have an excellent reputation. They also helped me many years ago when I thought quite wrongly that I wouldn't be able to relax without it.
Blessings. Suzi.
Ps. Reviews of my book needed please, Thank you xx
Time and time again the subject of cannabis arises and whether it can be used for medicinal purposes, particularly depression and emotional mood disorders. Here's my story and why I don't think it should be used if you have a depressive illness.
I know some people use cannabis for certain disease states, including Multiple Sclerosis and even Cancer and I used to use it for many years to help me relax. In fact I used it continuously throughout my twenties and well into my 30's to help me cope with my loneliness and inability to face up to my own depression. So in other words, I used it to help me cope with the daily grind of life and whatever that entailed at that particular time. I sometimes used alcohol in the same way, and would always have an emotional crutch in some way shape or form, in the hope that it would mask my low self esteem and in particular my rages and internalized anger which was part of my disorder. One particular evening, and this was after many years of smoking without adverse effects, I had the most awful of reactions, and what started as a panic attack quickly escalated into what can only be described as a terrifying psychosis with hallucinations thrown in. I was in the most awful of states and had to ask a friend to sit with me until the effects wore off, which incidentally was many hours after I had smoked. We came close to calling an ambulance which in hindsight is what we should have done!!
This reaction was so profound, I honestly swore never to smoke again, and thankfully never did, my cannabis days were over! I believe now, that the evidence speaks for itself and there can be a point that anyone can tip over the edge, regardless of whether they have emotional difficulties or not. However, if you do have a mental disorder, regardless of whether its hormonal, bipolar or schizophrenia then you are even further at risk. There is also some new research which is coming forward regarding the adverse effects of cannabis use if you have ADHD for example, and this can cause further mental illness later in life. It really doesn't seem worth it when you think of the long term effects and the damage it can do to an already fragile mind, although I know that others disagree with me. It seems to be that until you have that one adverse response, where you have been frightened out of your wits, you simply don't believe it can happen to you. From bitter experience I can tell you that it does and can have very serious consequences with some even needing hospital admission until their psychosis has passed. Some sadly, never recover and I have spoken to a few that have needed ongoing and long term care after a bad experience.
Fortunately for me, just having that one bad episode, was enough to stop me from smoking and for that I am eternally grateful. I no longer want to take the risk of tampering with something that I know is very precious, and that is the human mind.With this latest and all encompassing research which is available to us now, I simply don't think its worth it and we have to find another way to help us relax which doesn't involve putting ourselves at risk of psychological damage.
If you are having problems with cannabis use you can call Narcotics Anonymous UK on 0300 999 1212 who have helped many people I know and have an excellent reputation. They also helped me many years ago when I thought quite wrongly that I wouldn't be able to relax without it.
Blessings. Suzi.
Ps. Reviews of my book needed please, Thank you xx
Monday, 8 December 2014
Now you can buy my book!!!
I am absolutely delighted to let you all know that you can now purchase my book on Amazon. As of late, it is only available on digital, so Kindle, PC or any tablet, but this now means that my story can help save lives which was my sole intention. I'm also hoping that the publishing house will still put this book into paperback even though they have assured me that 'going digital first' is entirely normal.
Please help me to help others by telling all of your friends, even if they haven't suffered from depression themselves, as you can bet your bottom dollar that they will know someone that does! The story may also help someone realise that it is the hormones which are to blame for their misery, and not a bipolar or schizophrenic disorder. It will also help them find the right help and support, from the different specialists you can find, to the different therapies available.
I would like to personally thank all of my friends who have helped me enormously, and although there is far too many to mention in one blog, there are a few that spring to mind who without them,this publication would never have come into fruition.
They are, my best friend Belinda Hughes for her unwavering friendship during my illness. Lucy Jacques for building the website and amending, Samantha Fountain for her technical support and mostly my loving husband who has been the sponsor throughout it all, as well as being on the end of my most severe meltdowns. I would also like to thank everyone at St Marys Church, Burgh Heath for their prayers, and for helping me through the stress when I've felt like giving up and shelving the whole project (no pun intended).
Lastly I would like to thank Charlotte and Chelsey at Fox and Howard, and all at the Writers workshop, particularly Jane Struthers for their professionalism and advice.
And thank you to all of my friends, far and wide who have helped raise awareness for this evil affliction.
God Bless.
Suzi. AKA Caroline Church xxxx
Please help me to help others by telling all of your friends, even if they haven't suffered from depression themselves, as you can bet your bottom dollar that they will know someone that does! The story may also help someone realise that it is the hormones which are to blame for their misery, and not a bipolar or schizophrenic disorder. It will also help them find the right help and support, from the different specialists you can find, to the different therapies available.
I would like to personally thank all of my friends who have helped me enormously, and although there is far too many to mention in one blog, there are a few that spring to mind who without them,this publication would never have come into fruition.
They are, my best friend Belinda Hughes for her unwavering friendship during my illness. Lucy Jacques for building the website and amending, Samantha Fountain for her technical support and mostly my loving husband who has been the sponsor throughout it all, as well as being on the end of my most severe meltdowns. I would also like to thank everyone at St Marys Church, Burgh Heath for their prayers, and for helping me through the stress when I've felt like giving up and shelving the whole project (no pun intended).
Lastly I would like to thank Charlotte and Chelsey at Fox and Howard, and all at the Writers workshop, particularly Jane Struthers for their professionalism and advice.
And thank you to all of my friends, far and wide who have helped raise awareness for this evil affliction.
God Bless.
Suzi. AKA Caroline Church xxxx
Saturday, 29 November 2014
Today is the second anniversary of my Hysterectomy.
Two years ago today I had a hysterectomy. I also had my ovaries removed in the hope that it would cure my depressive episodes which were related to my hormonal cycle and had ruined some of the best years of my life. Even though this may seem radical (particularly to those that haven't suffered from this mood disorder) I really felt that it was my last chance at gaining some sense of normality in what was becoming an unbearable day to day existence with nowhere else to turn..
So what has happened since? And has it worked? Could I have been wrong and maybe it wasn't a hormonal disorder at all!
The answer to the above is that by the time I had made the decision to have major surgery, I knew it would work because I had researched every available text and paper I could get my hands on. I had also spoken to numerous health professionals and also sufferers that had also had the same operation. In short, I couldn't wait to have this organ removed that had already destroyed so much of my life.
To clarify, I no longer have mood swings, I no longer have screaming tantrums, I no longer have the compulsion to sleep and I don't feel tearful and overwhelmed by the most mundane of tasks. The mental chatter and racing have stopped, and I haven't had an attack of shingles in 2 years. I can also go shopping and face people without feeling panicked and terrified. I'm altogether a different person who is well and together for the first time in my whole life. What a miracle that is!!
You can now pre-order a copy of I blame the Hormones on Amazon which I have written with the sole intention of helping other sufferers. Please buy a copy or two and help raise awareness of how being a women can literally send you mad.
Peace and Love.
S x
So what has happened since? And has it worked? Could I have been wrong and maybe it wasn't a hormonal disorder at all!
The answer to the above is that by the time I had made the decision to have major surgery, I knew it would work because I had researched every available text and paper I could get my hands on. I had also spoken to numerous health professionals and also sufferers that had also had the same operation. In short, I couldn't wait to have this organ removed that had already destroyed so much of my life.
To clarify, I no longer have mood swings, I no longer have screaming tantrums, I no longer have the compulsion to sleep and I don't feel tearful and overwhelmed by the most mundane of tasks. The mental chatter and racing have stopped, and I haven't had an attack of shingles in 2 years. I can also go shopping and face people without feeling panicked and terrified. I'm altogether a different person who is well and together for the first time in my whole life. What a miracle that is!!
You can now pre-order a copy of I blame the Hormones on Amazon which I have written with the sole intention of helping other sufferers. Please buy a copy or two and help raise awareness of how being a women can literally send you mad.
Peace and Love.
S x
Thursday, 13 November 2014
Last nights Broadmoor Documentary.
Last night, and indeed last week, my husband and I watched with great interest the Broadmoor documentary on television. It gives a fascinating insight into life inside Broadmoor and the patients and staff that are behind these mysterious walls. My heart goes out to anyone that has suffered from mental illness, but I was also absolutely amazed by the standard of care and the professionalism of the staff and doctors, who are often working in the most dangerous of situations, with people that are extremely ill. The compassion and understanding that they showed was second to none and it made me feel extremely proud to be living in a country with such a wonderful national health service and such dedicated health care professionals.
Here is what I noticed. Without exception, all of the patients had troubled childhoods and were often victims of sexual, physical and emotional abuse. They quite often had been institutionalized from a very young age, so they had been in care or quite often in prison before their illness became paramount.
Secondly, almost all of them had suffered from an addiction which included alcohol or recreational drugs and sometimes even both as part of their illness. This then exacerbated the condition and massively contributed to a worsening state of mind often leading to delusions and then a psychosis .
So what came first the illness or the addiction? Was the illness a symptom of the addiction, or was the addiction responsible for their emotional disorder? For me its hard to say and the documentary so far has not given any leads. However its hard not to see the correlation between the two issues which often go hand in hand with the suffering person and will only worsen any illness.
The other thing I noticed when the patients were talking about their personal history, and is something to bear in mind if you are a parent, and that is they all spoke about feeling 'unloved' as a child, a nuisance even, and that made me feel incredibly sad as I contemplated how they must have felt during the early years of their life. You could almost sense the loneliness as they spoke and the sense of isolation that they had felt.
If there's anything to learn from this, it has to be that human beings need and deserve unconditional love during the most formative years, and it is this love which will prevent a change in brain chemistry and can help us become balanced and stable adults there after. We can literally prevent mental illness by flooding our children with love and affection or simply by making them feel secure.
For further reading on this fascinating subject I would read ' WHY LOVE MATTERS by Sue Gerhardt who is amazing psychotherapist and who really has proven that affection can actually shape a baby's brain.
For extra support, Alcoholics Anonymous - 02078330022
OR Narcotics Anonymous - 03009991212
Stay well and cuddle your children loads.
Suzi x
Here is what I noticed. Without exception, all of the patients had troubled childhoods and were often victims of sexual, physical and emotional abuse. They quite often had been institutionalized from a very young age, so they had been in care or quite often in prison before their illness became paramount.
Secondly, almost all of them had suffered from an addiction which included alcohol or recreational drugs and sometimes even both as part of their illness. This then exacerbated the condition and massively contributed to a worsening state of mind often leading to delusions and then a psychosis .
So what came first the illness or the addiction? Was the illness a symptom of the addiction, or was the addiction responsible for their emotional disorder? For me its hard to say and the documentary so far has not given any leads. However its hard not to see the correlation between the two issues which often go hand in hand with the suffering person and will only worsen any illness.
The other thing I noticed when the patients were talking about their personal history, and is something to bear in mind if you are a parent, and that is they all spoke about feeling 'unloved' as a child, a nuisance even, and that made me feel incredibly sad as I contemplated how they must have felt during the early years of their life. You could almost sense the loneliness as they spoke and the sense of isolation that they had felt.
If there's anything to learn from this, it has to be that human beings need and deserve unconditional love during the most formative years, and it is this love which will prevent a change in brain chemistry and can help us become balanced and stable adults there after. We can literally prevent mental illness by flooding our children with love and affection or simply by making them feel secure.
For further reading on this fascinating subject I would read ' WHY LOVE MATTERS by Sue Gerhardt who is amazing psychotherapist and who really has proven that affection can actually shape a baby's brain.
For extra support, Alcoholics Anonymous - 02078330022
OR Narcotics Anonymous - 03009991212
Stay well and cuddle your children loads.
Suzi x
Monday, 3 November 2014
The release date for my book.
Lots and lots of people have contacted me with regards to my book and the release date so here goes! The book has just had a legal completed which has bought up some issues and this has unfortunately created a delay. The book was supposed to be published in early December but now it looks more like January providing all goes to plan. I have had to revise the manuscript accordingly and of course that has been time consuming and at times soul destroying as is normal with any publication. To date it has taken over two years to write and some 8 years of research, so you could say I've been very disheartened at times and even willing to shelve the whole project (no pun intended)!
Despite the problems and subsequent delays, in terms of getting a copy you can now pre-order on Amazon and you should have your copy delivered no later than the end of January. If there is any further delays then Amazon have been extremely efficient in letting all customers know by email. Please order a copy or maybe even 2 and help raise awareness of depressive illness, regardless of its origins. You may know somebody that needs help and it can even save lives if there are enough copies circulating. It can also help healthcare professionals understand the correlation between our hormones and the destabilizing effect they can have on ones mind which is all too often ignored or simply not picked up on.
In the meantime I have read a fascinating article today regarding those wonderful scientists at Northwestern University in Chicago. They have developed a blood test for depression which will hopefully speed up diagnoses and rapidly change the way that depression is treated. It had the added bonus of relaying what will be the most effective treatment, and which therapies stand the best chance of working. This to me is the miracle of science and is the next step in treating and understanding the genetics involved in this biochemical abnormality. Hopefully this will mean the next generation of sufferers will have another weapon in the fight against mental illness.
Thank you for ordering a copy of my book. God Bless.
Suzi xx
Despite the problems and subsequent delays, in terms of getting a copy you can now pre-order on Amazon and you should have your copy delivered no later than the end of January. If there is any further delays then Amazon have been extremely efficient in letting all customers know by email. Please order a copy or maybe even 2 and help raise awareness of depressive illness, regardless of its origins. You may know somebody that needs help and it can even save lives if there are enough copies circulating. It can also help healthcare professionals understand the correlation between our hormones and the destabilizing effect they can have on ones mind which is all too often ignored or simply not picked up on.
In the meantime I have read a fascinating article today regarding those wonderful scientists at Northwestern University in Chicago. They have developed a blood test for depression which will hopefully speed up diagnoses and rapidly change the way that depression is treated. It had the added bonus of relaying what will be the most effective treatment, and which therapies stand the best chance of working. This to me is the miracle of science and is the next step in treating and understanding the genetics involved in this biochemical abnormality. Hopefully this will mean the next generation of sufferers will have another weapon in the fight against mental illness.
Thank you for ordering a copy of my book. God Bless.
Suzi xx
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)